Well Wednesday we signed the lease to our new house. Finally, even though it has only been 2 weeks since we found it, it feels like forever. Too many mornings of roosters waking me at 4.30am and Judd waking at the crack on dawn because the curtains in our bedrooms are light yellow and don't block out any of the light. The blokes hanging out at the 7-11 listening to very loud music until late at night, with the thump thump thump reverberating through our windows. I have to sleep with ear plugs in just to get a bit of quiet time to sleep. Not ideal. So you would think that we would be super excited on Wednesday after we signed and got the keys, but NO. We argued, and I can't even remember what it was about. All I know is I was so angry, not just at him but at the kids, at life in general. Thankfully he agreed to take the kids down to the pool and gave me a whole 30mins of alone time, how generous. I spent that time writing a furious email to my girlfriend tyring to get it all off my chest. That, combined with 2 glasses of wine I did start to feel better, until of course I had to go downstairs and meet them in the restaurant for what I call an express dinner. Since we can't cook in our apartment we eat in the hotel restaurant, but as anyone with kids knows it sucks taking small children out to dinner. They refuse to sit still, they never eat properly, they run riot all over the place and I spend the entire time chasing after the baby keeping her out of trouble. It is stressful and I hate it.
So once again I had to have a big talk with Marcus and tell him to try and understand that I have no one to talk to during the day, no friends to just call up or go around and visit. I talk, no actually, I yell at the kids all day then he comes home and doesn't want to talk either.
I have been told by other expats that the wives are always the ones to suffer culture shock. We are alone, we have no hobbies, no job and get bored and lonely. The husbands at least have their work to keep them busy, but the wives only have small children, who of course are suffering culture shock as well. These kids have no idea why we are so far from our home and families and why there are all these strange people pointing at them and staring and touching them and talking to them in weird noises. Of course they are going to play up and be naughty. And even though I am aware of all of this, there is nothing I seem to be able to do to stop it from happening. I get frustrated easily with the kids, I am tired all the time and have zero patience. In a way I am behaving very much the same way the kids are.
I went shopping these past 2 days to buy basics for the new house. Since we moved here with only 3 suitcases and a few boxes of toys and books, we have to start from scratch. This is a sore spot for Marcus and I. He doesn't want to spend anymore money, but I am trying to explain to him that we need plates to eat off, knives and forks, glasses and cleaning equipment. He should be grateful that we are in Thailand and it cost about a third of what it would cost if we were in a western country, but either he doesn't understand or just want to. I have told him to relax, I am not stupid I wont go crazy and buy too much or top of the range. For Christ sake I bought melamine plates and bowls instead of porcelain!!!! A little bit of appreciation would go a long way. Does he realise how hard it is to go shopping with two small kids who nag and run away and don't listen and just plain give me the shits all day long? I deserve a bloody medal!
I took the kids to see the house again today, Judd really likes it, there is so much space for them to chase each other around. There are 3 bathrooms! Coming from a house with only 1, this is a mansion. I can shut the gate to the carport and they can play safely outside, there is grass and we are literally 20 steps from the playground and the club house with the huge swimming pool. Judd asked me today if we could sleep there tonight, how cute. We also have a gardener that comes most days and a maid who will come 3 days a week. Our driver will start next Monday, and she will drive Marcus to work then come home and we will take Judd to school and then she will watch Lillie for a couple of hours while I have some alone time either at the gym or in the pool. I hope she works out, we are paying top dollar for her so I hope she is a worker and not a bludger. It all sounds rather extravagant, but it really is quite affordable. I guess that's why alot of expats who come on a 12 months contract like us, end up staying for years.
Hopefully we can move all of our stuff on Friday and stay the night, but I don't want to rush it, its too hot to rush anywhere in this country.
I want to decorate with some nice Thai pieces, but I will have to wait until Marcus gets over his paranoia about spending money. I don't want to buy anything too big as we are only here for 2 years and we don't really want to pack it all and try to freight it all back to Australia. But if I find some really nice pieces that I think I can use back home I will talk him into letting me buy it. What do you think my chances will be?
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