Mean Mommy

Why do men never use a plate, leave crumbs on the dish cloth, leave their shoes all over the house, leave toenails on the couch, wear the same smelly T-shirt for 5 days and then get cut when asked to clean up after themselves?
Oh and worst of all, have the uncanny ability to sleep through the babies crying in the middle of the night! How? It is like someone is clanging a bell next to my head when she starts up at 2am! I shake my head and ask again, HOW?

My hubby is great at helping around the house and I still come up with all these faults. He does the dishes, baths the kids, works the garden and does his own laundry most weeks.
When I tell people this they all say "wow he is fantastic, you are so lucky". And I am. But why do I nit pick all the time, the poor bloke can't catch a break some days. Even though he does all these things (and works a full time demanding job) he doesn't do them to my standard. So I feel I have to go over everything and do it properly, complaining the whole time, which of course he pretends not to hear.

Do I need to relax the reins a bit and be grateful that he helps out at all? As some husbands don't do anything. A sad fact which of course I disagree with. A marriage should be a partnership, 50-50. Just because a man works does not make him exempt from housework. If a man or woman lives in a house then they are responsible for the maintenance and cleaning of that house.
Housework is NOT a womans job and I will argue until I am blue in the face with any man who disagrees with me.

Hubby and I spoke alot before we moved in together about what each other expects from a marriage/defacto relationship and thankfully we both wanted similar things. I suspect that he would have preferred to come home and be waited on like when he lived at home with his family, but I flat out refused to mother him.
This ties into my post the other day about easing up the high standards I set on myself and my household, I need to let go and relax a bit more. I know that in 20 years when we don't have the kids to talk about and fill up our time he may wake up and realise how controlling I am and say "Enough!"

So yes, I do need to relax the reins a little bit, be thankful for the extra work he does do to help me out. I need to remind myself he is at work all day, usually working through lunch and coming home late to provide the comfortable lifestyle we live in. I appreciate all he does, I truly do. But it would be nice to be appreciated for all I do as well. As any mother out there knows, it can be damn hard work.
And I seem to be making it harder for myself.

"I am mean mommy, and nobody wants to F#$% mean mommy"

(if anyone reads this knows where I quoted this from, let me know)